I tried to post via text message, but that failed epically. 😦

Today was kind of bleh. Nothing extraordinary, as always. I didn’t get my school’s nomination for that scholarship– it went to exactly who I thought it would. That’s okay, though, I’ll self-nominate which is lame… and I’m very proud of my friends who DID get the nominations.

The race today was better than I expected. I ran it like I would a tempo run (as did most of the team) but still managed to run faster than the previous race at this course. It was nice and relaxed, and for once I wasn’t stressed out over the race. If I were to actually race and be that relaxed, I could probably do much better. Strange how that works.

I’m going to take a break from studying for my first AP US History test by writing this post. This seems counter-intuitive, but whatever. I’ll be waking up early to study more for APUSH anyway, so I might as well write what I want to.

Something I’ve been thinking about lately is body image and the way that we each see ourselves. Beyond that, the way in which people we don’t know that well perceive us based on our bodies or even the pieces of our personalities exposed during certain moments. We have a tendency to judge others; we don’t do a very good job of “imagining them complexly” (as John Green would say).

My question is this: have you ever experienced body liberty? One moment in time where no one could judge you, where you are completely content with your body in both form and function. I would say that very few people actually have that moment, and even fewer can make that feeling last for an extended period of time.

Lately I’ve been struggling with my perception of what my body should be and what it is. For me, this is a result of my body insecurity following my time in France (oh, that food, again…), and the demands that cross-country places on my body. It’s getting to the point again, or perhaps for the first time, where I’ve had that moment of body liberty and I am happy with my body. It’s very comforting to me to reflect on that moment and pull that feeling into my daily life. Impossible, of course, but still a reminder.

The thing is that other people do not seem to realize how important this is to me. The throwaway comments of others, degrading their own bodies or insulting others bodies, frustrate me. I want to ask them about why they think so poorly of their own bodies (or others). And then, beyond that, when they make comments about people that they don’t know very well, comments that hurt unintentionally… do you not realize that you aren’t imaging them complexly?

The way you view somebody is related to their appearance and their personality. If you only see or understand facets of either part of a person, then do not judge. Think of your own body and your own flaws, the small bits of yourself that you reveal at certain points. Think of your own insecurity about your body and your soul; pause a minute and think of body liberty and the personality that is greater than what you initially see.

…That wasn’t a very well put-together thought. Uhm. I hope you got my point; I was kind of pulling in two things that have been bothering me lately. One of those issues will be taken care of soon, which will be fun.

The person I appreciate today is Sean, for the non-nominee hug in the parking lot, despite his initial reluctance. xD

A demain!


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